help.
I don't know what to do. My head is all over the place. I haven't even taken my second shower for the day. Just keep staring into space and think and wallow and comforting myself. I'm still in my plaid shirt, only took off my pants and put on a pair of shorts, my hair tied but unruly, jaw clenching and unclenching itself, greasy face, just a plain mess. A plain, sad, depressing mess.
How do you forget?
How do you not reach the phone and call and tell that person about your day?
How do you focus?
How do you move on?
How do you comfort yourself? Give yourself a hug? Is that even possible? Even if it is, it just makes you sadder and more depressed.
How do you go about doing your assignments and not think of what had happened or might happen or the many what ifs?
How do you hold back your tears that keep forming every time you see some thing associated with the thing that makes you sad in the first place ?
How do you pretend that the last two years were nothing?
How do you erase memories?
I can't stand going to class and learn and talk and do assignments and all the freaking tests when all I want to do is just go home, lock myself in my room, lie in bed with Ducky and Creampuff and Quack and Nosepicker and cry all day. Maybe accompanied by Jeff or John or Jack's words of wisdom. I can't function properly. I can't think straight at all.
I'm utterly, completely lost.
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5 tissues:
olo dear.
jgn la camni sayang...
hugskisses
tul2... aku slalu rase cenggitu...
think of it back...
tears are my very dearest friends...
nash, u're not lost. u never will. u've still got a gud family, gud friends, n gud health esp a well-functioning brain to think straight. u're on the right track.
I talk to HIM, that works!
and oh, please do go to class, Literature in Esl Class and Methodology clases wont be the same without you!
I have to agree with Nadia there. you'd never be lost with all the wonderful family and friends around you. I can assure you, they work wonders in making you find you again. :)
but.... if you're kinda thinking of you knowww, finding someone. I actually know the most perfect guy for you. actually I think he knows too, but he just doesnt realizes it yet.
;)
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